SEARCHING FOR LOST “ME”

The act of attributing my boundless futile and nasty  thoughts as a  part  of girls inherent essence  has now grown to an  invincible habit within me. I am ashamed  to discover that those are just  my  lame excuse and a way of  defending my incompetency to eliminate those wicked  temperaments of mine.i find myself helplessly sinking deeper day by day in my  own vicious  mentality and this eventually provokes  an immense loathing  towards my own self.

i haven't noticed myself transforming to this strange women from an innocent little girl  until my consciousness was invaded by ruinous attitude which is  now almost impossible to get rid off.The girl that once used to be so confident and unwavering has been now transformed to a vulnerable funk  who dances foolishly  on others commentary about her irrespective of it being deceitful or genuine. 

i am so much disappointed to see myself hating  every bits  in  me  and immensely distressed by the way i promptly wear a fraudulent looks to impress others.those legitimate and pure thoughts of mine has been now captured by corrupted thoughts which just cares for useless beauty and charm.The pristine and productive actions of mine which was  once so spontaneous and effortless has now became excruciatingly  strenuous..

Many things has changed in me but those changes are devoid of  virtues..

These are the battles i got to fight alone and i have to anyhow bring out the good out of monstrous me….

Almighty with unwavering faith i bow to you,

enfold this fool with  your omniscience,

guide me forever....